Girls are far more strange than boys!

Ya know, sometimes I seriously wonder why my kids do the things that they do!  Never in A MILLION years did I think that I would talk about, worry about or laugh about certain things, like poop, fake farting, strange and unusual outbursts etc etc!  I was one of those girls and first time mothers who said "my child will never do that!!!"  I am here to tell you all that I ate my words and I have eaten them but good!!  And mostly with my girls! 

Today, I had just gotten the girls out of the shower and they were running around refusing to put their clothes on so I thought, "oh well, I'll just get in the shower and let them get cold!"  Well, I get out of the shower, I'm combing my hair, brushing my teeth, blah blah blah when Liv comes running into the bathroom to tell me that Sidney is acting like a bunny!  I tell her "thats so funny!  Go be a bunny with her while I get dressed and then get your clothes!"  So she agreed and I can hear them jumping and running around and Livi is still screaming and laughing about Sidney acting like a bunny!  I am thinking...."this is great, they are playing so well together and I am actually getting to get dressed and put myself together a bit."  BUT~  as I walk out to go get their clothes I come into the living room to see Livi laughing and squealing, calling Sidney a bunny only to find that the reason she thinks Sidney is acting like a bunny is because she has a huge piece of toilet paper hanging out of her butt!!!  Now.....I pose a question to all of you moms out there.....how does a child who is not potty trained running around with toilet paper stuck in her butt!!?!?!  I swear!!!!!  So at first I just stared and pondered how this happened and then I just had to laugh because since Liv was calling her a bunny she really was hopping like one with this piece of toilet paper floating right behind her with every leap!!!!  Still I am baffled and I tell you I could not make this stuff up if I tried!  I am truly not that creative!! 
By the way~  my daughter just called my son a "FREAKING TURD" for the second time and the word Dammit just flew out of my sons mouth which means that his man must have died in Super Mario Bo.!  So....I'm  off to scold!!!!

Signed with a sigh......
Mom, Momma, Mommy

What the .....?????

In between having my first and my middle children I sufferred 3 miscarriages.  It was a very difficult time for us but we made it through and didn't give up, thankgoodness, because we now have 3 beautiful children to show for our patience and struggle.  I still get sad from time to time when I think about it, but now, after a moment last summer, I have to laugh a little whenever I think about it.  So here's the story.........

One evening last summer (summer of 2010) my son and I were watching the movie "Up".  Well if you've seen it you will know which part I'm talking about, but if you haven't, there is a part at the beginning of the movie were the little couple is decorating a baby room and then in the next scene she is sitting, crying in the doctors office, only to have no baby.  Well, my son asks me why she is crying?  So I say to him, "I think she may have lost her baby, you know, kind of like how I lost my 3 babies."  Chase says, "I didn't know you lost 3 babies mom."  So I ask him if he remembers when I had to go to the hospital and when he asked me where the babies were that were in my tummy, etc etc.  To which he seemed to understand then because we ended the conversation with him saying "OH YEAH."  Okay, done right?  RIGHT!

Two days later, I'm in the garage cleaning some stuff up and Chase and his good buddy Garrett come walking up the driveway from Garretts house and they are dragging a cooler behind them that we had lent to Garretts parents.  So I give them usual, "Hey Boys!"  Well, Garrett stops dead at the edge of the garage and to my surprise says,"Sara, Chase said that you lost 3 babies."  So I confirm it and explain that they were little, blah blah blah, and he is still just kind of staring blankly at me and after a few minutes of silence he looks up and me and says......"But Sara, WHERE DID YOU LEAVE THEM and WHO TAKES CARE OF THEM NOW!?!"  He was completely mortified!!!  I just bursted out laughing and then had to explain to him how that actually happened!  He actually thought that I just decided that I didn't want those 3 so I just left them at the store or something one day!

I came inside and told my husband that I may have to call Garretts parents and do some explaining! 

So now, whenever I think about the 3 little angels I lost a small smile comes across my face now!  I will never forget that story!  It made such a sad time a little less sad somehow. 

Outta the mouths of babes~

Mom, Momma, Mommy

Poop....Everyone does it....but can YOU handle it?

I am not one of the people who has a weak stomach, I have worked in healthcare since I was 17 years old, I have 3 kids, a husband, and animals.  Even at my last job, one of my research studies was studying the effects of opioids on the bowel.  I could seriously tell you about almost everyone in the central IL areas poo!  I have had it wiped on me, thrown at me, on my walls, on my floors, my dogs have eaten it and not just there own they occasionally like a fresh diaper out of the garbage!  So this has no affect on me what so ever.  My husband, however, is another story!  Now I'm not slighting him in any way people I will be the first to tell you that I have, hands down, the most amazing husband that has ever lived!  You could never argue it with me!  But he just cannot handle the poop situation! 
Here is an example:  The other night we get up from the dinner table and our youngest is the only one left at the table.  As my husband and I are in the kitchen we hear a sound that should never come out of a little girl so small.  And here she is standing there, with this tousled hair hanging in her face, looking up at us with a big grin on her face and she says, "I Stinky!"  Then she starts backing up and I now see that the poop is running out of her diaper and dripping on the floor!  I turn around and he's gone!  GONE!  He is now backing out of the kitchen and telling me "You gotta take this one, I-I-I Can't do that!"  So.....at least he attempts to help by sending our son in with a towel!  Now some women might get really ticked off at this but ya know, I'd much rather him back out of the room then have to clean up after him too if ya know what I mean.
One night after our 2nd was born, she wasn't a very good sleeper, and I was so tired!  I think I had maybe slept for an hour and that wasn't even all at one time!  So she was up again, had pooped her pants and I am now crying because I am SO tired.  But my husband is sawing logs on the other side of the bed.  He hears nothing!  Now I know that alot of men just say that but this guy really hears nothing!  Unless of course its in the middle of the night and I have heard nothing but he thinks someone is breaking in!  No one ever is of course!  Anywho~ I was so tired and I was so angry at this point that I actually had the poopy diaper in the palm of my hand, open and hovered it over his head because I WAS going to slap him in the face with it!  Then, of course, sanity set in and I realized that if I went through with this that I was going to be up even longer cleaning up his puke too!  Still to this day he has no idea how close he was that night!  But I love him!
Then there is the day that my middle child came into the kitchen as I was cooking dinner and grabbed a spoon (no unusual as she likes to play kitchen) and took it into the living room where she was playing with her sister.  About 5 minutes later I peek in to check on them and I see her sitting at the coffee table and the dog is next to her eating off of that spoon she grabbed.  I took a little bit of a harder look and asked, "Liv...Where did you find chocolate?"  Then I saw that she was scooping the "chocolate" out of her diaper which was laying on the table!  The dog is just lapping it right up like he just got fed a milk bone!  Now, I really do try to watch my mouth around my kids but the only thing I could say at this point was "THATS SHIT!!!"  I ran in and grabbed it up and asked her what she was doing!?!?!  She just laughed of course and told me he liked it!  I guess I should just be glad that she wasn't feeding it to her sister! 
Again, just the tip of the iceberg!  I just hope if you are reading this that you aren't also faint of stomach!  Kate plus 8.....She's got nothing on this lady who's name is:

Mom, Momma, Mommy~~

SNAKES!!!!!

So I guess you should consider your children creative and imaginative when you find them throwing fresh green beans out of the refrigerator and then jumping up and down yelling "OH NO SNAKES!!!!"  Its one of those moments where at first you think, Shit, there goes the green beans that I just bought for dinner tonight!  But then you stop yourself and watch them laughing and think, "What the heck, looks like fun!"  So.....SNAKES IT IS!!!!!

Look at the world through a childs eyes and you'll find a much more enjoyable view~
Mom, Momma, Mommy

Can't even take a shower!

I'm getting out of the shower just a few minutes ago only to hear my 3 year old daughter squealing at the top of her lungs and the sound of the dogs nails running across the hardwood floors!!  As I enter the hallway to assess the situation the smell of aftershave gel hits my nose!  My yellow lab has just traded his smell of fart for Old Spice!  He was covered in it!!!  Then I turn into the dinning room only to find that our black lab is now standing on the table (ON ALL FOURS) lapping up the cup of yogurt that one of the kids opened!  Yep, this is my world and I only think that I'm in control of it!

By the way.......

When your 2 year old comes and sits on your lap, puts your face in her hands and gives you bunny kisses with her nose, you think......all of the make-up, designer clothes, and painted nails in the world could never make me feel as special as this!

This is how you know you've made the change

So even though my profession was in healthcare before it was "home engineer", I still got to wear comfortable scrubs but still had to maintain appearance.  I still got up  3 hours before I went to work and had my hair, make-up, jewelery and clothes just right.  I could even make a pony tail look shiek!  Anywho~ I realized the other day when I actually had the time to put on "some" make-up, actually straightened my hair and threw on a pair of jeans and shirt, I was getting complimented on how good I looked and "what was I doing, I look great!"  I couldn't figure it out, I thought I really did the bare minimum.  Then it hit me!  All anyone sees me in these days are my yoga pants, a sweatshirt, maybe, MAYBE some foundation, and a ponytail, which by the way was thrown up the moment I rolled myself out of bed to start my day!  So I thought to myself....WHERE THE HELL DID I GO!?!?!?  My poor husband, God love the man!  Here I used to wear nothing but skimpy matching Victoria Secret sets and now I climb into bed in my granny panties and flannel pants.  And he still tells me I'm pretty!  Which makes him a SAINT in my eyes!  I haven't shopped for myself in almost 3 years really and why...because I was pregnant for most of those years!  So...I have made myself a pact that this frumpy shlumpy woman who is now me will be no more!  I might be known 24 hours a day (and proud to be known) as Mom, Momma, and Mommy..but I'm still me, I'm still young and I've still got it (uh, for the most part!) 

Does it just RAIN toys??!?!

So last year we added a 5th bedroom in our basement which has become the playroom for the time being.  And I have to say that room could accomodate a daycare with the amount of toys in there!  I cannot believe it!  I clean out that room at least every other month and every time I go in there it is like there is more and I don't know where it is all coming from!  I mean it!  I know what you are thinking here, "Lady quit buying your kids all of those toys!"  I know!  I would totally think it too  but the thing is, is that we don't!!  Unless its a b-day or Christmas no new toys come in this house for that very reason!!  So what the heck??  I mean is there some sort of toy gnome that sneaks in our house at night and just scatters crap all over that room!?!?  A boogy man, a fairy that has just blessed my children by dropping toys from the sky in the night?  NO!  The source of this problem is the 3 children who live in this house and who scatter toys from room to room.  I think that they do this on purpose, ya know, to decieve me into thinking that I have finally conquered the mounds of stuffed animals, baby dolls, action figures, and god forbid the dreaded legos!!!  Its like they divide and conquer!!!  As if to confuse me!  Well............they are winning!  I'm headed back down to the basement and if you don't hear from me tomorrow please call for help!

Laughing all the way~
Mom, Momma, Mommy

My Tip Jar (HEHE)

So when my husband and I went to file our taxes the government wouldn't allow us to claim our 3 year olds pre-school because I am a stay at home mother.  Not that this was a huge deal by any means, it didn't change our return or anything like that but it ran through my head that we stay at home mothers get so little of the respect and recognition that we deserve.  And I can speak from both sides being that I worked full time right up until my 3 baby was born.  After that, what was my choice?  I wasn't making 100's of 1000's of dollars a year, I was making a good living but not enough to make daycare for three worth it!  You all know I know you do!  I mean it has even been proven that the work of a stay at home mother who has just one child is worth 100,000 a year!  I would love to see those men and women sitting in those governing chairs to attempt for just one week what a stay at home mother does! 
So...today I was doing laundry and I kept finding change with every load and I had a thought!  I went and grabbed a little sparkly container and set it on my dryer and that is now my TIP JAR!   Because not only am I doing our government and society a favor by actively raising my children the way most do, I also taxi, cheerlead, coach (in the backyard anyways), cook, clean, sew (not well mind  you), fix the ouchies, take care of the animals, referee the fights, and the list goes on and on and on and it doesn't end, not for one minute of any day.  And not that I'm not happy to do it, I'm hear by my own free will and I'm blessed to be able to do this.  There are many women who would love to be in my shoes.  I just don't see any harm in taking in a little bit of profit for my much needed services!  However, I think I'll only be tipping myself!  But hey, if it makes me feel better, why not! 
Loving every bit of life!
Mom, Momma, Mommy

The Valentines Cards and the Grocery Store

Had to stop at the grocery store yesterday for what should have been a 5 minute trip.  Had all 3 kids and it started out pretty well until the girls saw the candy down the candy isle.  Mind you I do everything in my power to not let them look down this isle!  So they start jumping up and down yelling "momma, momEE, we want suckers we want suckers!"  So they did say please and we get the bag of sucker and they rip into them immediately!  Meanwhile my son finds a box of NBA valentine cards and wants a box, so sure, why not.  Then my 3 year old wants a box of Barbie cards.  Fine.  So here we are almost finished and of course I have forgot something.  So we book it down that isle and from behind me I hear my 9 and 3 year olds fighting.  Don't know what about but all I know is that as I turn around they are now using their oh so needed valentines card boxes as weapons!!  Before I can say NO my daughter smacks her brother directly in the face and now its really on!  9...AND.....3!  So I grabbed the cards out of both of their hands and told them that no one gets them!  To which they protested and they were making such a scene, mostly my daughter that I took the boxes, threw them up over the isle, hopefully not hitting anyone on the other side, and we quickly proceeded to the check out, then to the car, then home where everyone went to their rooms! 
By the way, my husband called while all this was going on at the store, only to ask, "how's it going?!?!"  God love him!

Mom, momma, mommy

The one who calls me mommy

Let me tell you a  little bit about my youngest.  She is the one who calls me mommy or better yet..momEE!  She was a bit of a surprise but aren't most!  She is sweet, quiet til she's mad or wants the attention and she NEVER EVER STOPS!  She has sticky fingers if you know what I mean.  Always grabbing what isn't hers and running off.  For instance, the other day she ran off with my cell phone and as I went after her she jumped on the couch and spun around falling over the edge breaking my phone!  She is the one who will be the first to get me called into school for something and at this point I can't even imagine what it will be!  I CANNOT turn my eyes away from this one! 
Right now she is sitting here next to me and the second her sister started to come near to sit too she stands up and starts saying "nope, nope!" 
Let me just tell you a few of the things she has pulled.  By the way once you hear these things the first thing that you will think is where is this mother!?!  Its not that she isnt' watched, it is that she is SO sneaky! 
First of all she took off with the walking and the talking early, had to keep up with the other 2 I can only imagine.  Once in the grocery store she sat in the cart and opened almost every danimals yogurt drink (I'm trying to fly through the store and actually was not paying attention because she was quiet) and dumped them quietly onto the floor.  So I had to buy another package of paper towels since I had to use the first to clean up the yogurt. 
The other day she kept getting into the refrigerator.  We don't have a double door fridge so I can't use the child locks, but she kept getting in there and needless to say the dogs got an entire pack of bacon and whole pound of deli meat!  I got her side tracked or so I thought only to find her throwing trehe entire carton of eggs on the floor!  I sprinkled it with baking soda, got it all clean only to turn around and find her in the dinning room swimming in the rest of the box of baking soda!  So by the time my husband got home the refrigerator was completely taped shut with duct tape!  These are just a few of the biggies, most days its dumping dog food, pulling clothes out of drawers or breaking drawers because she has pulled them out to use them as stairs to get something off of the counter!  Not to mention every moveable chair in this house is going to get put away so they can't be used in her hijinx!  I did threaten to do this the other day and said that I didn't care if we ate on the floor until the chairs were only used to sit in!  It may still happen. 
Well shes messy, shes wild, but she sure is sweet, and one day I'll miss having eggs thrown onto my floor.  But I don't see it being real soon~
Signed,
mom, momma, mommy

Baby Girl going on 20!

My 3 year old and I were in the mall the other day and as we pass by every store that is playing music she peeks in and says "they're dancing in there!"  We keep walking and every store we pass that has music she calls the "dancing store."  Then we come to EXPRESS.  With their brightly colored front window that displayed a very sassy little spring number that I only could dream of wearing 15 years ago, and its accessorized with a bright pink wedges.  This is the point that she completely stops and turns to the window with a look like a light from heaven was shining down on this outfit and says "Momma, I LOVE those shoes!"  Then she sees the shoes in the other window and says, "Oh I Love those more! Those are fun dancing shoes momma!"  Of course little does she know that those will be THE most uncomfortable dancing shoes ever but honestly, my motto has always been that if they are cute, a little discomfort is worth it! 
Anyways~ then I catch her in a mirror at her grandmas house and she has a make-up wedge and she is ever so carefully pretending to put her make-up on and she is being very diligent for 3 and for not actually having any make-up!  It was then that I stared into that beautiful little girl in that mirror and saw 10-15 years into the future.  I saw her all dressed up and sitting at a vanity in her bedroom getting all dolled up to go out with her friends or a boy and I realized that is really going to be coming soon.  All too soon!  I only hope that she will still look at me like a superhero at that time and tell me "I love you momma." 
Yes, I know I'm delusional but hey one can wish and I'll let you know as soon as I return from never never land! 

Picking up~

Whoever said "Picking up after your children is like trying to shovel during a snowstorm" was SO right!  Unless you put them behind a baby gate and leave them there all day (which by the way should not be done!) you're doomed!  And mostly because.....you are just plain out numbered!  At least I am!  And according to my wonderful husband if I was just organized, made a list, etc etc etc and blah blah blah I would be able to get more done.  Yeah...whatever babe!  You try changing the oil to the car with two toddlers hanging off of each leg~  I challenge ya!  Kisses!

Welcome to My World

Hi there, my name is Sara and I am a 32 y/o stay at home, suburban mother of 3.  I have been married for 9 years to my high school sweetheart Scott.  I have been both a full time working mother and a full time stay at home mother.  We have a nice home, nice vehicles, 2 dogs, a cat, and a turtle (because I'm a sucker you will soon find out).  My son plays basketball, baseball, soccer, and football and sometimes they are going at the same time.  He also is a cub scout.  My daughters are 20 months apart at 3 and almost 2!  I never thought that motherhood would end up leaving me feeling so satisfied yet at the same time so torn.  I have always been a very outgoing, social butterfly type of person and I have always loved kids.  I LOVE MY kids.  But, being a stay at home mom can definitely take a toll on you as a person and also your relationship with your husband and friends.  There is no you time, not unless on occasion you are lucky enough to get out of the house even if it is to run and get a movie because just driving in the car alone with the music blaring can be 20 minutes of therapy.  Its very easy to lose your sense of self and to not just define yourself as mom, momma, and mommy.   It is most especially hard when you live in Central IL and get stuck in your home because we just had a blizzard or its -22 degrees outside!  That can truly mess with a person!  HA!
On the other hand, I have 3 little angels (i use that term loosley some days ;-) )  They make me laugh, at times they have made me cry but they are snuggly, loveable and most of all extremely entertaining which you will also find out if you keep reading this!  Just to give you a hint as I sit here typing my 3 year old is yelling at me from the bathroom to please come wipe her butt because she just had a REAWY GWOSS POOP and she stinks!  At the same time my 20 month old is sticking her fingers up the poor dogs nose!  This is just the tip of the iceberg people.  OH yes, believe me we have had kids feeding the dogs poop with a spoon out of the diaper they just ripped off, my son "tattooing" my daughter from head to toe with markers, and so so much more!  So get ready and welcome to my world!
Because, such is the life of the stay at home mother who answers no matter what to Mom, Momma, and Mommy~